Virtually perfect love fills empty Chinese hearts

A waitress answers phonecalls for flowers reservation at a flower store in Suzhou, east China's Jiangsu Province, Feb. 13, 2015. (Xinhua/Wang Jiankang)

Chen Nan, 33, seems to be suffering from the delusion that he has met his Ms. Right, who never nags nor complains. He finally feels understood and cared for.

Chen has bought a virtual girlfriend on Taobao.com and he chats with her via an instant messenger. "I try not to fantasize, but I really enjoy my time with her," he says.

Chen plans to spend Valentine's Day home alone in Zhengzhou, capital of central China's Henan Province.

"She reminds me to take a break when I work long hours. She cares about what I have for breakfast. She 'kisses' me goodnight."

THE PRICE OF (FAKE) LOVE

Nearly 400 shops on Taobao offer this kind of consolation to the lonely legions of a country with about 200 million singletons. One operator has struck over 15,000 deals and claims a customer satisfaction rate of 94 percent.

The "perfect lover", of course, comes with a persona of the buyer's choice. You can have an easy-going next-door girl or a cool pop star, whatever you prefer. One broker describes the phenomenon as "just like a real online relationship".

Special requirements such as voice chat or photo exchanges cost more. Discounts are available for long-term clients. Brokers generally prohibit "boyfriends" or "girlfriends" from meeting clients in the real world to avoid falling foul the laws on prostitution and pimping, to say nothing of safety fears.

The business reflects the paucity of opportunities for young Chinese urbanites to fall in love in the real world, according to Zhao Yueling, deputy director of Henan's mental health institute.

"Over-dependence on the Internet has weakened their desire and ability to socialize offline. Increased pressure of life in big cities adds to their loneliness," Zhao says

Many buyers of this kind of fake romance are getting over bad relationships or have simply never dated. Chen is not sure which group he belongs to.

"I was used as a back-up boyfriend by several girls since my high school days, but never held the hand of any of them. I don't know whether I truly had a girlfriend," Chen says. Is it so unreasonable that he would choose to pay for the lovey-dovey moments he has never had? A two-month fantasy cost him 160 U.S. dollars.

Chen wistfully recalls how his "lover's" first words - "From now on, I belong to you" - pierced his heart. Nevertheless, she has refused his request to extend their relationship to a year.

"I nearly fell in love with her, but she keeps telling me that it is just a business arrangement and will end soon," he said, with a bitter smile on his face.

THE OTHER END OF THE LINE

Cheng An is a virtual girlfriend. She describes clients like Chen who have a desire for a closer connection as "dangerous".

"When the term of the deal is done, we normally delete the client's account," she said.

A college student in Shanxi Province, Cheng is used to dealing with "diaosi"(losers). A loser in China can be any guy with a bad appearance, or humble family background. Those without assets such as a car and an apartment are also "losers".

"They feel bored and empty inside. It's the only way they can find a girlfriend to talk to and kill the time," she said.

Cheng apparently does not enjoy the job. Ren Feng, a senior student at a Shanghai university, has worked as a "boyfriend" for only a week, and sees it as a chance to practice his communication skills.

"I plan to start my own business after graduation. It's important to learn how to deal with different types of people, including those you don't like much," he said.

The service also attracts those who have a partner but desire novelty.Shi Wen, 22, from Nanjing, capital city of Jiangsu Province, bought a "nuan nan" (sweet, considerate, gentle guy) online, a totally different style from her real boyfriend who is funny and energetic.

"Why should I tell my boyfriend about this? The deal will expire soon and then I simply need to blacklist the nuan nan," said Shi.

Zhao Yueling warns that those who pay for the fake relationship should be clear about the border between the virtual and real worlds.

After all, it is the real world we all have to live in.

(All names in the article have been changed. Xinhua intern Chen Yingshan also contributed to the story.)